Are you spending a lot of your time as a parent feeling guilty about something?
If so you are not alone and it will last for years and years!!. It could be others who make you feel guilty, but a lot of the time it will be the pressure that you are putting on yourself.
I work with many different families and I have drafted a list of the sort of things that parents that I have worked with have told me they feel guilty about:
Working long hours and not spending enough time with the children.
Getting home late for the pick up from nursery or childminder because you got caught up at work.
Using a phone or tablet to distract you child.
Getting cross or shouting at the children.
Actually preferring being at work than with the kids (but you can't admit this easily).
Serving quick cook meals from the microwave.
Not finding enough time to spend with your partner.
Spending too much time on the mobile.
Giving in all the time.
Forgetting important events, dates or parties (or not even important ones!)
And so the list goes on. Feeling guilty and being a parent seem to go together.
The important thing here is to t and put things in perspective. Try taking one thing at a time and analysing it in an impartial, objective way if you can.
Make a list of all the things you feel guilty about and just see how many you can cross off.
Like not keeping the house clean and tidy all the time...
Doing the housework might be important to you because you don't enjoy living in a messy environment, or it might be one of the things that you can let go of feeling guilty about. If it is then cross it off!
What about the scary thought of preferring being at work than with the kids?’
This may be the case for whatever reason and you are not the only person, but does feeling guilty about it help at all? Just roll with it and cross it off
So you get the idea. Try and find perspective and get the list down.
Feeling guilty isn't going to help anything, just cherish the good stuff you do as a parent.
All that guilt does you no good at all so it really is time to let some of it go.